Mindset Snapshot at Forty
Turned 40 today. Here’s a snapshot of the mantras and tenets of my personal OS. I have picked up these from friends & family, reading and remixed my own1. Some I’ve had for a long time, other’s have become important more recently.
Mind the Joy: be mindful of the moment — even stuck in traffic with screaming kids, you’re together, safe, loved and heading to a home. Very few moments in our life are one’s we rather not-exist than be in them.
Think Positive: this is a better take than Marcus Aurelius’ not being afraid of tomorrow. Things have an amazing way of working out. Of course there’s a lot of biases and human adaptability behind this, but who cares? Use it to your advantage.
Be Proactive: a recent reframing of be a good person from Marcus Aurelius’– at least much more actionable.
Writing Helps Thinking: doesn’t matter if it’s on a napkin you throw away or a text file, all thoughts are ephemeral until you attempt to externalize them. Writing is the simplest, cheapest, fastest and best lifehack you have.
Never Keep Score in Relationships: specially in marriage. If you are thinking in terms of net-positive or negative, you’re doing it wrong and somehow it always shows. We’ve been part of tribes for millennia, we all have a sixth sense about it.
Find the Fun: it takes less effort than being mad. It’s like polarized sunglasses for reality — doesn’t change it, but it gives you more detail with less strain.
Remove Negatives Before Adding Positives: helps a lot in buying gadgets, but applies to everything.
Put on Your Mask Before Helping Others: works in flight emergencies and in life. Notice that you still help others, but careful with continuously placing others needs ahead of yours. The burden on you will be multiple times more than the benefits of the other. Or if flipped: a slight delay on taking care of the other might not be noticeable for them, but provide a much needed breather for you.
Hope you notice the lack of productivity in the above. I’ll revisit this soon, but it’s not an accident.
Which means they’re likely stolen.↩︎